The Power of Laughter

I recently promoted a simple breathing technique as a free tool that anyone can use to alleviate a wide range of physical and emotional problems.  Here's another freebie for your wellness and life enrichment toolbox: laughter.

Before you laugh it off as too easy to help with your problems, consider the source of true laughter.  It comes from joy, bliss, happiness, or love.  So this is not the point-and-laugh kind of laughter.  Schadenfreude is only temporarily uplifting at best.  I'm talking about the kind of laughter that wells up in you like bubbles of overflowing joy and just has to burst out.  It lightens your heart and unburdens your soul.  If love and joy are among the highest vibrations of the human experience, as many metaphysical teachings suggest, then laughter is your inborn ability to raise your own vibration. Love and inner peace go hand in hand.  I truly doubt that peace can be sustained in a heart that isn't filled with love, joy, or forgiveness.

Laughter does more than improving your spiritual self, though.  There is are mental, psychological, and even physical benefit that you can take advantage of as well.  Laughter relieves stress, which in turn, can help alleviate pain and improve organ function for those who experience stomach, intestinal, heart, or lung problems associated with stress hormones.  Stress relief is a major factor in successful weight loss.   Laughter helps relieve depression.  It actively works the diaphragm, which can help improve lung function, and powerfully exercises the abdominal muscles which are instrumental in maintaining correct posture and keeping your spine aligned.  When groups of people share laughter, it strengthens the bond between them.  Laughter is healthy and essential for maintaining and healing family, romantic, and friend relationships.

So, just in case your body, mind, spirit diet is short on laughter today, here's a little exercise you can try.  Laugh, out loud, for 1 minute.  You don't need a reason.  Set a timer and just belly laugh.  Yes, it will be forced at first, and forced laughter isn't going to have the same level of benefit, but it's better than nothing, and after 10-20 seconds you'll feel so silly it will turn into real laughter  That's a good thing!  Once it becomes real it just flows.  You'll feel lighter, more peaceful. You may feel improved circulation.  You've given your abs a quick work out, and you may even feel more inspired as you go into the rest of your day.  What could be better than that?

More Than Just Coping: The Power of Breath

Recently I’ve been seeing a lot of posts online about various fitness challenges being suggested.  A popular one involves doing 30 seconds of plank every day for a week, and gradually increasing to a 2 minute plank over the course of 1 month.  Just to be clear, “plank” is when you hold your body perfectly level to the floor, usually holding yourself up on the forearms and toes, but can also be done from the palms, knuckles, or knees if modifications are needed.  The objective is to hold the body perfectly rigid, like a board. People who attend my Pilates classes regularly know how much I love to include planks.  The plank position is a fantastic strength building exercise for the core and lower back, with some bonus toning in the arms and chest.  In my classes we generally do a set of 3 planks (30 seconds, 45 seconds, and last for a full minute).  I suspect this 30 seconds to 2 minute plank “challenge” I’ve been seeing is intended for fitness beginners or people who don’t currently have much core strength, but want to start building that foundation up reliably.  For those people, I highly recommend it, and hope that it’s actually being tried and not just reposted.

For me, however, or people that I work with regularly, holding a 30 second plank once per day is not remotely a challenge.  So, I devised a different plank challenge for myself that would allow me to harness the benefits of holding plank position, but still offer a reasonable amount of challenge.  I decided that I would start with a 2 minute plank, push up into a 5 minute downward facing dog, and then level back out to a second 2 minute plank. I would then bookend it around my day, once in the morning, once in the evening.    Every week I decided to increase the length of the plank by 1 minute until I eventually reached a 15 minute set (meaning 5 minute plank, 5 minute downward facing dog, 5 minute plank).  I feel that 15 minutes twice a day is a reasonable amount of time to commit to a personal challenge.  Once reaching that goal, I decided I would add leg raises to increase the challenge without increasing the time.

At the moment, I am only in the second week of my self-proclaimed challenge. For the record, it’s hard! But that was the point.  I wanted to be challenged.  It takes my focus, but is not out of my reach.  And it has brought my attention back to one of the primary lessons I teach my clients: everything is easier when you breathe with purpose.  Sometimes when I get to the end of my day, after teaching Yoga, Pilates, Water Aerobics, Pilates again, and taking a 2 mile walk around the lake at lunch time (because I have also challenged myself to take an average of 15,000 steps per day—it’s good to have goals), I will be completely exhausted.  My focus and willpower during my evening set of planks is often flagging.  I will decide, yes, I am committed, and I’m going to stick with my plan, but that final minute of plank takes every ounce of my willpower to see it through.  The thing that gets me to the finish line is my breath.  I do a very deep, moderately paced, forceful breath, in through the nose, out through the mouth.  It goes in cycles of about 3 seconds in, 3 seconds out, fully using the diaphragm.  This breathing technique focuses me.  It steadies me.  It keeps me in plank, using good form, even when I’m tired, and carries me through to the end with strength and grace. (Grace on both a physical and mental level.)

Right now, I’m using this breathing technique to master a difficult physical routine that I want to achieve.  But I have used it in many other situations before.  That is what I want to share with you today.  Not the benefits of plank or the thrill of succeeding at such a challenge (and I am totally killing it so far, but the way), but to share the power of this simple breathing technique.

I have most often heard it called “The Energizing Breath,” but I’m sure there are many other names for this technique.  You don’t need a lot of lung power to begin using it, but using it will quickly increase your power and lung capacity.  You can use it to focus yourself,  and as I am doing with my current endeavor, to carry yourself through a physical activity.  You can use it for pain relief.  If you’re in chronic pain, or have a sudden pain that you can’t immediately remedy, doing this breath helps reduce the pain so that you can function until the pain subsides.  This technique also works well with emotional pain.

Over the past year, as I’ve been dealing with the grief of my mother’s untimely death, I’ve tried a wide range of things to help me cope with the oppressive weigh of that grief.  Having goals helps.  Having awesome friends and community involvement helps, too.  But sometimes, the pain is too much.  The inside of my chest feels like it’s collapsing in on itself.  My heart beats too fast, my vision gets tunneled, and I feel like someone has kicked me in the gut.  Grief manifests in many forms.  For me, this is the physical manifestation of my grief over living in a world without my mother.   It feels like I’m going to be crushed under the weight of it.  But if I remember to do the Energizing Breath, steady, deep, forceful breaths, in through the nose, out through the mouth, the pain begins to dissipate.  It’s like turning on a light in a very dark room.  Every time the grief tries to consume me, I do this breath.  It clears away the pain until I can bare it again.  I still feel the sadness, but it doesn’t suffocate me.  Using this breath, I do more than just cope.  I move forward.  I heal little by little.  I integrate my loss instead of being consumed and stagnated by it.

This is my offering to you today: focus, mental clarity, improved lung capacity, emotional and physical pain relief, and stress relief all in one.  This technique can also be used to help wake you up in the morning or calm you down before bed at night.  It’s totally free and takes practically no training to master.  Unlike other breathing techniques, such as what you might use during meditation, you can begin doing this one right away.  You will become better and better at it over time, but you don’t have to learn how to do it, or practice it in order to use it successfully.  You just need to try it.  Put force behind the breath.  Pull in through the nose quickly; push out through the mouth with purpose.  That’s it.  Breathe really hard as DEEPLY as you can.  That’s all there is to it.  Put it in your toolbox and use it every chance you get.

What a Relief

The more I seek my own self improvement, on all levels (mental, physical, and spiritual), the more I have come to realize the vital importance of stress relief as a part of my daily training.  Ask just about anyone what they know concerning the effects of stress, and they will tell you that "stress can kill you," but it does a myriad of other degradation along the way.  The path of stress is not a quick course to the grave; it is a long and agonizing way to put yourself under. It's also nearly unavoidable.  However, you can always choose how you're going to deal with it so that you can reduce or negate its effects.

Stress can manifest as physical problems like chronic pain or fatigue, elevated blood pressure, and gained weight that won't go away.  It can cause mental and emotional problems like anxiety, anger, and depression.  The build up of stresses can block our spiritual path leading us to self-sabotage, self-doubt, and even abandonment of our goals and dreams.  Stress has become so pervasive in our lives that we're willing to write it off as "the norm" and accept the problems that can arise  rather that addressing the issue itself.

I often talk to clients who are suffering with physical or mental issues that are clearly stress induced, and when I ask them "What do you do for stress relief every day?" they'll respond with "I don't have time to deal with it every day."  But what if just a little "work" on your stress relief reduced your pain and fatigue to the point where you could actually finish goals you've set for yourself?  Is that not worth it?  What if the little bit of conscious, purposeful stress relief is the missing element  in your current plan of action that would allow you to reach your success?

Here's a great example, and I use this one because it turned out to be true for me.  Let's say you want to lose some weight. You track your exercise, food, calories, water, vitamins, and hormone levels religiously, but nothing works.  The harder you work at it the more you actually gain weight.  You're being healthy, you're being active, you're being hydrated, and your doctor says there's no physical reason why you can't lose weight.  What's wrong?  Too much stress, not enough relief.  No matter how healthy you work at being, your body feels the stress and holds on to every ounce of water and fat to keep you protected from the pervasive threat you're always feeling.  This makes it feel like all your hard work is for nothing, so you give up.

Now, let's say you add little daily stress management to your exercise, healthy food, vitamins, and filtered lemon water.  The change can be dramatic.  When something you do is successful that, in and of itself, is a form of stress relief that can lead to even greater successes.

How can you find the right stress management to add to your programs?  It's very individual, but the key is, it must be conscious and purposeful.  You need to be aware within your process, so things like watching TV and playing internet games, while entertaining and not stressful, are not effective for stress relief.  The most effective stress relief will allow you to remain in the moment with them.  Some examples of things you can do that can help you stay in the moment: play with your dog or your child (and that means stop everything, be in that moment, and enjoy the play), sing, dance, write in a journal, do a senses walk, grow plants, meditate, do just 5 minutes of deep breathing, soak in the bath tub while doing your deep breathing.  There are tons more, and what works for you is going to be totally individual to you and what fills you with joy and freedom.  The key is to choose an active form of stress relief rather than a passive relaxation that shuts your brain off.  Stay engaged in your stress relief process.  Do at least one purposeful stress management activity every day.  It could make all the difference in attaining those goals that seem just a little out of reach.  It could also help you live longer.  And if you're going to live longer, you might as well feel good and be happy while you're at it.

Count Your Blessings

In the months since my mother’s passing, I have spent a lot of time looking for ways to manage my grief.  Small things often do make a big difference, and the reality is that grief simply takes time.  You have to be with it and go through it in order to get past it.

However, in the meantime, as life is going on, as life is want to do, it is necessary to find ways to stay chin up in order to keep moving forward.  In both the best and worst of times it is often recommended by nearly every spiritual teacher out there to keep a gratitude journal.  I’ve highly recommended this method myself.  Gratitude keeps the heart light, even a broken grieving heart, if you can make the shift.  But I found that the more I wrestled with my feelings of loss and grief the harder it was to connect to the feelings of gratitude even as I was in the process of writing about things that I know I am grateful for.

One day, I decided to just count my blessings.  Literally.  Ever one of them, as they happened.  “I woke up this morning.  That means I’m still alive.  It’s a blessing.”  That’s one.  “I have a roof over my head.  A good one.  And I like this house.  It’s a blessing.”  That’s 2…maybe 3 if you want to be technical about it.  “There’s one banana left, just what I need for breakfast.  It’s a blessing.”  So I did this all day, any time I thought about it, and do you know what?  72 blessings in one day!  Now, even if you’re feeling low and only come up with 10 or 12 things all day long, that’s a seriously blessed day.  Did you know that you were that blessed every day?  It’s one thing to think about all the little things we take for granted, or even big things we quickly forget about, but if you write them down, one at a time, and then give them a number and actually count them, you may be totally astonished at how blessed you truly are.  Often I did not actually appreciate that something was a blessing until I wrote it down and counted it as such.  “Five of my clients thanked me, with genuine gratitude for the class I taught today.  Wow, that is a blessing!”

 It’s a very simple practice.  You might even try alternating between gratitude journaling and counting blessings.  I’ve been able to change my perspective on bad, sad, and lonely days many times just by realizing that in the midst of all the pain, hurt, loss, confusion, and dissatisfaction, there are still a wealth of blessings even on the worst of days.  The pain may still be there, but at least when you have a list of blessings to review at the end of the day, your last thought will be light and filled with gratitude regardless of whatever else you’ve been feeling.  Ending on a positive note is always a good way to begin a little better in the morning.

Time and Tide

Time and tide wait for no man.  I know that.  I am watching that very fact play out before my eyes.  Yet here I am, waiting...waiting.... Waiting in numb, shocked silence.  Waiting for what?  I don't know for certain.  For the silence to become the earth shattering scream I expected?  For the end of the world to have the good grace to come the way I thought it would when my mother died?  Of course, I knew the world wouldn't end, but in every fiber of my being, I truly felt it would.

For those who know me, or who follow my posts in social media, you'll have heard the news, several months ago now, that my mother passed away after not one, not two, but three intensive battles with cancer.  It's not that we didn't see it coming.  We did.  But that doesn't make her death any less untimely.  We had all shaped our future with the expectation that she'd be in it: myself, my family, her friends, her colleagues and co-workers, we were holding open a space for plans we hoped she would fulfill.  She's gone, none the less.   What do we do now with that great, gaping hole?

Everyone feels this way when their mother dies, don't they?  I'm guessing here, because I've lost plenty of friends and family members in my life, but only one mother.  This is like no grief I've ever known.

There are many types of bonds between mothers and daughters, but for me, my mother was the one person in all creation who truly understood me. She knew me from the brightest peaks to the darkest depths of my soul.  She knew what to say, when to say it, and how to say it, even when I didn't know myself.  I am blessed in that I feel deeply loved in many aspects of relationships that I have with people in my life.  But there is a big difference between love and understanding.  Mom understood!  She just knew.  All of those things I could never put into words, she could express in a single sentence.  It was a soul level knowing that I may never experience again in this life.

I have always been, at the very core of my being, free-spirited.  I see the world a little differently.  I always have.  I am a ship that rides wild currents, that often, others cannot even see, but my mother, she was my lighthouse. Without her, I am cast adrift.  To me, she was the Oracle at Delphi, The Library of Alexandria, and the guiding light of the North Star all rolled into one.  How do I plot a course without her?  Where was I going, anyway?  Do I even want to go there if we can't go together?

Painfully, inexorably, time marches on.  Mother used to always say "This too shall pass," in times of adversity.  It gave me a lot of strength in the past, but feels incredibly hollow now.  I see the world is moving.  I see that the worst has already come to pass.  I know that I can only move forward.  I can not honor her parting by standing still.  But for this moment, for just a little bit longer, I am waiting.  Where do I go from here?  I no longer know how to find the shore.

Perhaps in the new year I'll be able to impart some wisdom about health, wholeness, or the journey to inner peace.  I have always hoped my words will inspire others in a positive way, whether subtle or profound.  But right at this moment, I'm so far off from my center, I can not inspire anyone.  But maybe I can tell my story.  I can share this tiny sliver of my grief  in pale and empty thought forms, mere shadows compared to the demon I tried to describe.  Maybe that story can reach others in the depth of despair and for just a moment, perhaps they will know that they are not alone.  Sometimes you have to be still in the darkness.  It's OK to feel broken, even for very spiritual people.  Sometimes, the only thing you can do is wait, weeping as the world passes you by.  Because this too shall pass...isn't that right, Mom?

Book Signing

I will be having a Book signing for Kundalini Rising one week from today on Friday, May 24th at The Bay Leaf Market in Crawfordville, FL.  We are scheduled from 4pm - 6pm, but I expect to arrive a little early.  I'll be happy to sign 1st or 2nd edition copies of my book if you already have them.  If you don't have a copy of the book yet, you can buy the 2nd edition at the signing.  They're $14 each.  We'll also be having a drawing for those who attend.  The prize is a t-shirt with one of my illustrations from the book and my favorite saying, "When in doubt, just breathe."  I say this to my students all the time in my classes, but I think it's a great piece of advice for life in general.

Bay Leaf Market has food and books for sale and a cafe area.  There are vegan and vegetarian options available.  Come in and have a chat with me.  I'll be happy to talk yoga, food, philosophy, health and wellness, or answer any questions my readers have for me.  I may also do a short reading from the book.  I expect it will be a fun, community event. Everyone is welcome, even if you are new or inexperienced with Yoga.

For anyone in the area who is unfamiliar with my work, Kundalini Rising is an exploration of chakra clearing using Yoga postures.  It also includes a lot of general tips about health and wellness and was purposely written to be accessible to both experienced yoga practitioners and novices.  I included a lot of information about how to protect and realign your physical body for healing and to achieve the greatest benefit from each posture.  All of my illustrations that go with the various postures are loving caricatures of real people that I see in Yoga classes.  The 2nd edition includes an expanded index (I labored over that, for the record), new material, and updated information.  I carefully considered feed back and questions from students and readers when I decided what needed to be improved in creating the 2nd edition.

For anyone interested in the book who cannot make it to the signing, Kundalini Rising is available on Amazon.com in both kindle and paperback format.  For those who can attend, I look forward to seeing you there!  Namaste.

May Day

The time has come! I am returned from my 2 month absence.  There were a number of misfortunes and hardships that befell my family recently, and I have needed all of my energy to deal with them.  I didn’t feel I had the reserves to be fully present and focused for my work here, so I decided to hold off on making any posts.  My purpose as a writer and teacher is to uplift, inform, and inspire those who encounter my work.  I want every word I write to come from a place of alignment with my purpose, so if I am not fully present and engaged in my material and message, I am doing you a disservice.  That is the primary reason I decided to wait until I had regained more solid footing again. I apologize to anyone who may have been waiting for the next part of my Aging Gracefully series.  I intend to post two more parts to that series: one on food for youthful health and one concerning the breath.  I also intend to do a more lengthy discussion of the importance of breath work as well as examples and some discussion of inner peace, how to find it, and how to deal with pain, stress, and loss on the road to inner peace.

Today, on the first of May, it is a day for celebrating fertility and fruitfulness.  In between the classes I teach, I have been taking a little time to walk outside in the sunlight.  It is about the most perfect Beltane day you could hope for up here in the Pacific Northwest. I am grateful for the chance to enjoy the sun on May Day even on a busy teaching day.

If you haven't already done so today, take some time to enjoy the abundance in your life, no matter what form it takes.  You could spend time in your garden or tending indoor plants. You could take a side trip to the local market and purchase some fresh fruit, vegetables, honey, or flowers to enjoy.  A cup of fragrant tea shared with a friend would also be a wonderful way to give thanks for the fruitfulness in your own life experiences.

I will pick back up with my Aging Gracefully series in the next week or two. My posts may be slower than I intend depending on the shifting situations of health, family, and professional commitments, but I do plan to finish up that series this month.  I hope Aging Gracefully brings information and inspiration to everyone who visits this page.

I would also like to announce that I will potentially be doing a book signing at Bay Leaf Market, vegan and vegetarian café/grocery in Crawfordville, Florida later this month.  I will post more details as I have them.  If you’re in the area, drop in and say hello.